15 Tips How to Stop Being Jealous of Successful People

Jealousy. That green-eyed monster rearing its ugly head whenever someone else’s accomplishments make our own feel tiny by comparison.

The temptation to compare our behind-the-scenes daily grind with others’ highlight reels is incredibly common. Rest assured, nearly everyone grapples with jealousy of successful peers at some point.

Yes, it’s painfully normal to struggle with envy upon seeing friends, celebrities, or even strangers surging ahead in areas we feel stuck. 

But while jealousy may be common, staying trapped in its toxic grip benefits no one. The good news? With targeted mindset shifts and proactive steps, we can break free from destructive comparison to channel that energy into our own growth instead.

Read on to learn tangible strategies for how to stop being jealous of successful people – and start being more inspired by them.

Is it normal to be jealous of other people’s success?

Yes, it’s completely normal to feel jealous of other people’s success from time to time. A little jealousy isn’t necessarily a bad thing, as long as we channel those feelings in a productive way.

It’s human nature to compare ourselves to others, whether we intend to or not. When we see friends, peers, or even strangers accomplishing great things like landing a dream job, publishing a book, or buying a nice house, it’s easy to start questioning why we haven’t reached certain milestones yet. Social media especially brings these comparisons to the forefront.

The key is to notice when we’re spiraling into destructive thought patterns triggered by jealousy, like beating ourselves up or undervaluing our own worth. Just because someone else is thriving doesn’t detract from our own talents and potential. Their journey has no bearing on what we’re capable of.

Rather than resenting high achievers, we can reframe envy as an opportunity to learn. Their success stories can motivate and inspire us to set bold goals of our own suited to our unique strengths and passions. With strategic planning, resourcefulness, and determination, we can absolutely accomplish great things in our own right, on our own timeline.

So don’t despair if you sometimes feel jealous when others are crushing it. That just signals it may be time to reflect on what success means for you, and then take tangible steps toward that vision. Comparison can drain us, but when channeled properly, envy can energize personal growth.

Now, let’s go deeper into some practical and actionable steps for dealing with envy of other people’s success.

How to Stop Being Jealous of Successful People

It’s normal to feel jealous when you see others succeed, but it’s important to turn those feelings into positive actions.

The key is how we respond to and redirect those feelings. Rather than breeding resentment, we can use that envy as rocket fuel to refocus on our own definitions of success and take tangible steps towards meaningful goals that play to our unique strengths.

If crafted properly, a touch of jealousy can even spark positive changes leading us to our best lives.

Here’s how you can do that:

Focus on Your Unique Strengths and Progress

Aim to define success on your own terms instead of comparing it to rigid standards. Make a list of your core talents and what you value most. Then reflect on how you can continue applying those in purposeful ways. 

Track incremental progress to maintain a growth mindset, even if you still have far to go. What matters is your improvement over time, not where you rank next to your peers. Avoid putting yourself in boxes or assuming limitations on what you can do.

• Identify what you do well and build on those strengths.
• Track your progress regularly to see how far you’ve come.
• Set personal milestones that are meaningful to you.
• Avoid comparing your journey to others’ paths.

Turn Envy into Motivation to Improve

When feeling envious, pause and ask what specifically triggers those emotions. Pinpoint any skills you admire in that person or resources you wish you had.

Then explore small, realistic steps to develop those yourself. Turn the energy of envy into drive and initiative, rather than resentment. Envy reminds us of things we care about and pursue unfulfilled dreams requiring more effort on our part.

• Use jealousy as fuel to work harder and smarter.
• Set specific goals to reach the level of success you admire.
• Learn from those you envy by studying their habits and strategies.
• Channel your energy into productive tasks rather than dwelling on envy.

Limit Comparisons to Your Past Self

Rather than constantly gauging yourself against others, reflect often on how far you’ve come. Compare today’s knowledge and abilities only to where you used to be, not where someone else is now. Remember all the progress made and obstacles overcome to reach this point.

If you still don’t feel satisfied, use that as motivation to accomplish more going forward. Setbacks and slow periods are part of every journey – focus on continual learning.

• Compare your current self to who you were yesterday, not to others.
• Reflect on your growth over time, no matter how small.
• Set personal benchmarks based on your own potential.
• Focus on self-improvement rather than external achievements.

Celebrate Their Success as Inspiration

Next time you feel jealous, intentionally reframe that into celebrating their accomplishments. Let go of the zero-sum mindset that thinks their winning means you losing.

Mutual success is possible, so seek to collaborate when feasible. Also realize that if they can succeed, so can you with the right strategies and effort. Use others’ victories as proof that big goals are possible to motivate your own journey.

• View others’ success as proof that your goals are achievable.
• Congratulate others on their success to build positive connections.
• Learn what worked for them and apply similar strategies.
• Take inspiration from their journey to enhance your own.

Set Clear Goals and Work Towards Them

Envy often stems from feeling stuck while others surge ahead with purpose. Combat this by getting very clear on your short and long-term goals. Outline the specific actions to reach them and timelines for progress.

Break major objectives down into smaller milestones to tackle bit by bit. Schedule regular check-ins on how you’re tracking and be willing to adjust course when needed. Envy thrives in vagueness so eradicate unclear expectations.

• Define what success means to you personally.
• Break down your goals into actionable steps.
• Review and adjust your goals as you make progress.
• Keep your goals realistic and achievable to maintain motivation.

Acknowledge Your Achievements Regularly

Make a habit of intentionally recognizing wins, no matter how small. Write down or vocalize the recent accomplishments, learnings, positive feedback, or growth you’ve experienced. It’s easy to gloss over daily progress when focused on the next summit.

Counteract this by routinely congratulating yourself to reinforce momentum. Solidify the belief that you are capable by cementing your previous success.

• Make a habit of celebrating your small wins.
• Write down your accomplishments to remind yourself of your progress.
• Share your successes with others to boost your confidence.
• Reflect on your journey to stay motivated.

Avoid Social Media Triggers and Detox

Minimize time spent consuming highlight reels from acquaintances that spur jealousy. Be mindful of which platforms or accounts breed negative social comparison. If you know certain activities provide no value but consistently envy others afterward, abstain entirely for set periods.

Remove apps from devices or log out to take a deliberate break. Reflect if constantly spectating others’ curated lives prevents you from truly showing up for your own. Then set appropriate boundaries.

• Unfollow or mute accounts that make you feel envious.
• Set limits on social media usage to avoid constant comparisons.
• Take regular breaks from social media to focus on your goals.
• Replace social media time with activities that make you feel positive.

Practice Gratitude for Your Own Journey

When you notice envy creeping in, pause to actively appreciate the privileges and progress of your experience so far. Verbalizing specific things we feel grateful for builds contentment and self-esteem from within. Write thank-you notes to mentors, supporters, or opportunities that enabled your growth.

Look back at old journals or photos to cement how far you’ve come. Implement daily gratitude rituals as an antidote to “not enough” mentalities fueled by jealousy.

• Start a daily gratitude journal to focus on what you have.
• Appreciate the progress you’ve made, no matter how small.
• Recognize the unique opportunities you’ve had.
• Shift your focus from what you lack to what you’ve achieved.

Embrace the Process, Not Just the Outcome

Often jealousy fixates on other’s public victories without seeing the long game or tradeoffs behind them. Remember that lasting success reflects years of perseverance, risks, and sacrifices not visible externally. If we only celebrate the outcome, it’s easy to dismiss our own effort as meaningless without similar fanfare and achievements.

Counter this by relishing small daily progress, not just distant goals. Enjoy the process of gradual improvements through consistency. Define measures of success at micro levels too.

• Focus on the skills and experiences gained, not just the end result.
• Enjoy the learning and growth that comes with pursuing your goals.
• Accept that progress can be slow and that’s okay.
• Stay committed to the journey, not just the destination.

Seek Mentors Who Uplift and Guide You

Combat isolation or uncertainty in your journey by proactively finding positive mentors. They can validate your abilities, share wisdom from overcoming similar envy, and provide tailored guidance on leveling up. Even just one strong emotional supporter bolsters resilience to envy’s sabotaging effects.

Lean on role models who celebrate collective advancement, not just individual stars. Internalize encouragement from those further ahead to drown out self-doubt triggered by jealousy.

• Find mentors who have achieved what you aspire to.
• Choose mentors who encourage and challenge you positively.
• Regularly consult with your mentor for guidance and advice.
• Be open to constructive criticism to grow faster.

Surround Yourself with Positive Influences

Audit your inner circle and media sources to reduce exposure to those who breed overt competitiveness, resentment of fellow creators, or toxicity around achievement. Instead, immerse yourself among those focused on meaning over clout, intellectual curiosity over drama, and ethical empowerment over cutting corners.

You’ll internalize those attitudes, so curate communities that speak to the person you aspire to become. Positive environments allow everyone to shine freely.

• Build a support network of people who inspire and motivate you.
• Engage with individuals who encourage your growth.
• Limit interactions with negative or toxic individuals.
• Participate in communities that share your goals and values.

Shift Your Mindset from Scarcity to Abundance

The mindset of believing only limited seats at the top fuels jealousy since others’ success feels threatening. Challenge this by adopting an abundance paradigm realizing our value doesn’t depend on outperforming others. There is room for everyone to cultivate meaning and impact in their own sphere without treating life like a single elimination tournament. 

Broaden your concept of what “success” means beyond money, fame, and status symbols to more holistic fulfillment across health, purpose, relationships, and personal growth. There are infinite paths to thriving.

• Believe that there’s enough success for everyone.
• Focus on opportunities rather than competition.
• Practice generosity by helping others achieve their goals.
• Recognize that someone else’s success doesn’t diminish your own.

Prioritize Self-Care to Boost Confidence

Strengthen confidence in your worth outside of accomplishments and assets by focusing on daily wellbeing habits, not just aspirational dreams requiring more socioeconomic power. Don’t put enjoying life on hold until some future victory.

Are you moving your body, fueling creativity with hobbies, connecting with loved ones, and getting restful sleep now despite not “having it all” yet? Commit time and budget to restore yourself regardless of output. Self-care builds security that your needs will be met along the journey.

• Develop a consistent self-care routine that includes exercise and rest.
• Practice mindfulness to reduce stress and anxiety.
• Invest in activities that make you feel good about yourself.
• Take care of your mental and physical health to stay resilient.

Use Jealousy as a Signal to Refocus

Treat pangs of envy as automatic alerts to pay more attention to your inner landscape when you’ve drifted off course. Ask “What do I really need right now – inspiration or comparison?”

Use flashes of jealousy to catch unhealthy obsession with others so you can recenter. Then channel that energy into your personal priorities that uplift you. Turn envy triggers into reminders of your core motivations and the next right action to align with those again.

• Recognize jealousy as a sign that you need to realign your goals.
• Use it as an opportunity to reassess your priorities.
• Redirect your energy towards your own progress.
• Turn negative feelings into a positive action plan.

Remember Everyone’s Path is Different

The grass may seem greener on the other side but no one else faces your precise mix of obstacles or opportunities. Avoid presumptions about how easy the road was for those now ahead. Honor how even those in similar fields or contexts take varied trajectories based on luck, health issues, family factors, and more.

Release rigid timelines expecting linear ascension at certain ages. Instead patiently persist in the right general direction, even if progress ebbs and flows. Your path remains meaningful regardless of pace.

• Accept that success comes at different times for different people.
• Understand that your journey is unique to you.
• Avoid comparing your beginning to someone else’s middle.
• Focus on making your path one that you’re proud of.

Conclusion

At the end of the day, jealousy usually arises when we lose sight of our own path focusing instead on the journeys of those around us.

The solution lies in routinely recentering our mindset, priorities, and habits back on what fulfills us. Define success and progress in ways where others’ victories expand the pie for all rather than threatening limited territory.

Keep taking small consistent actions aligned with your values and talents. Soon feelings of envy and inadequacy will transform into inspiration and self-confidence in the never-ending adventure of becoming your best self.

Our peers’ triumphs lose their sting when we wholeheartedly embrace being lifelong students. By using pangs of jealousy as cues to water the grass in our own yard, over time, we may just love the vibrant green view right where we stand.

FAQs

Can jealousy of others’ success be harmful to my mental health?

Yes, jealousy can harm your mental health by increasing stress, anxiety, and low self-esteem. Over time, these feelings can create a cycle of negative thinking that affects your overall well-being. Addressing jealousy early is essential to protect your mental health.

How does social media influence feelings of jealousy towards successful people?

Social media often shows an idealized version of reality, making it easy to compare yourself to others. This constant exposure can amplify feelings of inadequacy and jealousy, as you only see a partial view of others’ lives.

What are the signs that jealousy is affecting my well-being?

Signs include persistent negative thoughts, difficulty feeling happy for others, and a constant need to compare yourself. Increased stress, anxiety, and low self-esteem are also indicators that jealousy is impacting your well-being.

How can I stop comparing myself to others and their success?

Focus on your own journey, practice self-compassion, and limit time on social media. Surround yourself with positive influences and set personal goals to reduce the urge to compare.

How can practicing gratitude help reduce feelings of jealousy?

Gratitude shifts your focus to what you have, helping you appreciate your own achievements. Regular reflection on the positive aspects of your life can diminish feelings of jealousy.

Is it possible to turn jealousy into motivation for self-improvement?

Yes, use jealousy as a signal for what you desire and set goals to achieve it. Channel the energy into productive actions like learning new skills or pursuing personal passions.

Can talking to a therapist help with feelings of jealousy towards others?

Yes, a therapist can help you understand the root causes of your jealousy and provide strategies to manage it. Therapy can also improve self-esteem and foster a more positive outlook.

How can I focus on my own achievements instead of others’ success?

Set personal goals, track your progress, and celebrate your achievements. Shift your mindset from comparison to appreciation of your unique journey. Practicing mindfulness can also help you stay focused on your own experiences.

What role does self-confidence play in reducing jealousy?

Self-confidence reduces jealousy by helping you feel secure in your abilities and worth. When confident, you’re less likely to compare yourself to others and more likely to appreciate your strengths and achievements.