Is it selfish to want to live alone?

When it comes to living your life the way you want, it is important to understand that it is your life that you are making a decision on, not someone else’s. And living alone is a choice that has nothing to do with other people’s lives, which doesn’t make it selfish in any way.

Because really, you are the master of your own destiny, and if you want to lead a life in solitude, the choice is yours and only yours to make.

Wanting to live alone is not selfish since it can be a personal choice driven by the desire for independence, peace, or self-development. It simply means that you are more comfortable living alone than you are with other people. This decision is context-dependent and varies based on individual needs and circumstances. Respecting personal space and needs is key to understanding this choice.

Is wanting to live alone normal?

Yes, it can simply be a lifestyle preference. Similar to how others enjoy living a life surrounded by people they love, there are also others who simply prefer a more private and solitary life by themselves. There is nothing wrong with wanting to live alone since it is fairly common and can be a great opportunity for personal growth. In fact, there are plenty of people(myself included) who find bliss in the idea of living alone. 

Why is wanting to live alone not selfish?

While living alone may not always be an option, it is almost always a choice. While living alone may ooze with selfishness for some, it’s never likely the case for many. With life choices like wanting to live alone, there are varying reasons why someone would choose a certain lifestyle, which is essentially a personal preference. Of the many reasons, here is a handful of why it is not selfish to want to live alone: 

Social life can be draining.

While social life can be more draining on some than others, those who are introverted and generally prefer being alone find it especially tiring. With an especially draining social life, a quiet personal space away from all the noise and drama would be a refreshing way to reset and find tranquil alone time. With a busy social life outside, living alone in a home is a nice way to balance them.

A preference for a more private personal space.

Speaking of personal space, living alone means being able to privately let loose and unwind without distraction or anyone to judge, which many find to be a pleasant experience. In a way, solitary living allows people to be comfortable and be their true selves. It means being able to freely walk around the house with nothing on, leave the bathroom door open when using it, and literally dance like nobody’s watching. 

An understanding of the power of solitude.

Those who have initially struggled, persevered, and then benefitted from being alone, have a good understanding of the power of solitude. Solitude is difficult at first, but over time, it slowly becomes a powerful experience that can bring about significant change. Those who want to live alone simply realize this and would like to take advantage of the growth opportunities and benefits of being alone. And if you live alone, these benefits can be even more impactful than just temporarily being away from a busy household, since you have all the alone time you want. 

Valuing independence and self-reliance.

Living alone may even be the opposite of being selfish since this means preferring an independent lifestyle where you are responsible for just about anything and everything that happens to you. A solitary lifestyle at home means not needing anyone else (even if it’s a neighbor), which can be a completely selfless way of expressing one’s value for self-reliance and independence. 

Better personal growth.

In accordance with valuing independence, people who want to live alone are not being selfish when they choose to prioritize self-care. Deciding to work on one’s self comes with the intention of personal care, and is completely different from the intention to hurt or siphon from others. This is because wanting to live alone means you want to look after and care for yourself, which has nothing to do with other people.

Improved focus and productivity.

Similar to valuing personal growth, living alone can also mean valuing personal space for better focus and productivity. For those with busy lives outside their homes and at work, living alone is their way of finding quality time to get things done. Living alone means being able to focus better and lead a productive personal life, which some people value highly. Especially for those who are creative, imaginative, and innovative, living alone means enhanced focus and higher levels of inspiration and ingenuity. 

Safety in being alone.

Sometimes, others prefer living alone not because they are selfish, but to feel safe from the real negative(selfish)  people. They prefer not to risk living with toxic persons that may not be good for their well-being. For them, living alone is way better than having to deal with messy or loud housemates, which is very reasonable and not selfish at all. 

Conclusion

The desire to live alone is by no means selfish since it is a form of self-care, which is a way of recharging one’s energies without taking up others’. Wanting to live alone is essentially a lifestyle preference with intentions of being independent and enjoying one’s own company, which does not involve other people. 

 FAQs

Q: Why do some people who live alone feel guilty?

A: Society has, in the past, associated living alone with selfishness. However, it’s important to recognize that it’s not selfish to prioritize your own well-being and happiness.

Q: How can I overcome feelings of guilt about wanting to live alone?

A: It’s important to understand that it’s something that may change your life for the better. You don’t need to feel guilty about prioritizing your own well-being and happiness.

Q: Is living alone a sign of individualism?

A: Yes, living alone can be a reflection of individualism. It’s an expression of independence and self-sufficiency, except in the crudest possible interpretations.

Q: How can I explain to my family that wanting to live alone isn’t selfish?

A: You can convey that it’s a form of self-care and self-fulfillment, and it’s not usually a reflection of being selfish. You are making a decision that may help you prioritize your well-being and happiness.

Q: Are there societal pressures that make people feel selfish for wanting to live alone?

A: There might be some societal expectations, especially in cultures that prioritize family or marriage, but it’s important to recognize that it’s okay to prioritize what’s best for your own mental, emotional, and physical health.

Q: Does wanting to live alone mean I don’t value relationships and connections?

A: No, wanting to live alone doesn’t mean you don’t value relationships or connections. It’s simply a personal choice, and it doesn’t diminish the importance of the people in your life.

Q: How can I cope with the stigma associated with wanting to live alone?

A: Surround yourself with supportive individuals who understand and respect your decision. Remember, it’s okay to make decisions that prioritize your well-being. You don’t have to conform to societal expectations if it doesn’t align with what’s best for you.